Please keep your lord out of my mammogram
The weirdest thing happened to me a few weeks ago when I was getting my mammogram. My right breast was being gently shmooshed by the technician and I told her I was grateful to her for being so skillful and not causing me excruciating pain as has happened in the past with less skillful people.
Her response: “I’m so glad to hear that. But don’t thank me -- thank Jesus. Now please lean a little more forward and to the left. Perfect. Excellent. Now hold your breath a few secs so I can get my photo.”
I did what I was told, while feeling more than a little weird about her Jesus comment.
When she came back she set my breast free and proceeded to tell me about how hard her life had been until two years ago. She said she’d had a rough childhood and kept making bad choices when it came to men. She was a single mom of a teenage boy who was getting into trouble. Then she found her church, her pastor, and Jesus and things became so much better.
“When you’ve found Jesus and you know you’re going to heaven, it’s all you need, isn’t it?”
She stepped back and looked at me.
“I feel so worried for everyone who hasn’t found the Lord, don’t you?” she said?
All this before she’d moved onto breast number two.
Well. There was a lot going on in my head at that point. All at the same time.
WTF?
I’m genuinely glad you’re not suffering so much anymore and have found comfort and support for yourself and your son. I really am. But WTF?
This is my mammogram, not your proselytizing platform!
I’m a Jew. Leave me alone!
So I said: “Just so you know, I’m Jewish and we believe in God but not Jesus. And I’m really happy for you that you’ve found exactly what you needed for you and your son. I’m ready to do the next breast now!”
She paused a moment, then said how much she loves the children of Israel, and something else about Jesus and heaven that I tuned out. I was feeling slightly nauseous by then.
She finished the mammogram and it was as physically painless as before. She really knew how to do her job. I got dressed and said goodbye.
“Just remember, it’s never too late,” she said, smiling at me. “I hope I’ve planted a seed.”
“Nope, you haven’t,” I told her, not smiling back. “I’m good to go, so don’t waste your time worrying about me. I’m very happy with my relationship with God and don’t need to go through Jesus. Have a good day!”
When I got home I ran as fast as I could into the house and told my husband the story. He was as shocked and appalled as I knew he’d be. He knows that when I go out into the world (thrift stores, gas stations, Target, ATM machines) people tend to tell me their stories, and I usually love listening and connecting. He also knows there are many people are out there trying to convert others to their beliefs. But in the middle of a mammogram?
Obviously, I’ve thought about this a lot. I thought about calling the medical facility and reporting her, but I won’t. She’s a skilled mammographer who’s found meaning and comfort in her religion after many years of suffering. And I'm sure she was just doing what she’s been told to do: spread the word.
But here’s the thing. There’s a slippery slimy slope between worrying about other people’s souls and forcing them to do something about it. Just ask my Native American friends.
I think I can speak on behalf of most Jews, when I say we don’t want to be converted to Christianity. Just accept that we don’t believe the same way you do and find a way to either be okay with it, or wrestle with it in your own mind if you must. Please understand that if we haven’t experienced anti-Semitism directly, then we know someone who has, or we’re carrying a heavy load of generational trauma.
When my daughter was a freshman in high school, a group of older boys found out she was Jewish and thought it would be cool to terrorize her in the corridors when no adults were around, shouting Heil Hitler! as they gave her the Nazi salute. The school administration were appropriately horrified and handled it very well when they found out, but there are some scars that never heal completely when you are the target of hate at the age of 13.
Earlier this year, in the Orthodox Jewish community in Los Angeles where my cousin and her family live, two men, both wearing clothes that identified them as religious Jews, were shot at while walking home from morning prayer services. The gunman has a long history of anti-Semitism. They survived their physical injuries, but I can only imagine the trauma they, their families, and others in the community have been living with since then.
On Monday, 9/11 anti-Semitic flyers were dropped in streets of the Del Cerro neighborhood of San Diego. The flyers accused Jews of being responsible for the 9/11 attacks.
All this is to explain why, when well-meaning Christians try and convert me, it’s a trigger. Us Jews are a diverse bunch – culturally, ethnically, and in the ways we worship or don’t worship. But the one thing we have in common is that we just want to be left in peace to be who we are.
Who doesn’t want that?
The good news is my mammogram was normal and next time I’ll definitely be requesting a different technician. Hopefully I’ll get someone who is able to make every woman who finds herself in a position of naked vulnerability both physically and emotionally comfortable.
References:
https://www.kpbs.org/news/local/2023/09/11/more-antisemitic-flyers-dropped-in-del-cerro-neighborhood
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